How to spot a psychpath or sociopath (there's a difference)

[wonderbunny]

I thought you might find this topic interesting, I wish I knew more about this a long time ago. Maybe it might help anyone who happens to view this topic. I still recovering from 'sociopaths are a lot more common than I thought' No wonder I went to a therapist!

The sociopath is a common folk. They tend to be the type that keep picking and picking, and you don't want to fight; they continue, you brush them off... and then they hit you up again. You snap back some remark 'Eat your oatmeal, Its none of your business!' And the next thing you know you are the most hated person in America. They trigger easy and you subject of bad gossip for a very long time. Unbeknownst to them they have no self awareness that they are the problem, nor do they seem to be able to comprehend boundaries.

The pshychopath is a much more difficult preditor to spot. They generally appear so very charming and irresistable. They seem to have to much in common with yourself, that your first instinct is to tell them everything and that's the key. They are so very interested in every part of your life, they have no problem lying about their own life just to get information about life to be used against you in the future. They slowly absorb your identity (usually for some financial, sexual gratification) The relationship will not last too long. They like to progress up from their social standing and pick their prey carefully. Its when the victim begins to realize this charming so-called friend is actually a viper snake ready to strike. That's when all hell breaks loose and the betrayel is beyond comprehension. Many find themselves out of a job, a relationship, caught in legal matters that have no logical reason to them. In hindsight you never saw it coming, but your are never the same. (Key: They always pick the 'nice' people, but the victims are also very intelligent people. With knowledge, you can be protected. Generally, they are the first people who will realize something just doesn't feel right- The psychopath tires easily with the victim and no longer is friendly and the verbal assault begins as they whittle down every characteristic in a very systematic way. They like to put their own character defects upon the victim. Like a snake shedding their skin and wrapping its victim in it. Your identity has been rewritten. And people around you with also be victimized. The pshycopath likes the challenge of the game. They also are backstabbers and never 'do' confrontations. They are cowards. But they also trigger easy and never like to be found out. They can only carry on so long before the true identity begins to surface. Generally it last long enough for their bad behavior to begin to ruin their own reputation and then they seek a new victim or partner to better themselves. Relationships are very superficial with only a financial gain associated with them. Emotional ties are not present. The victim is left isolated and generally financially bankrupt in most areas of their life. Picking up the pieces is a long hard road.

[fluffy]

interesting.................. why are you telling us this Bunnikins?...... .............you seem to know an awful lot about it....lol.......
It seems that being either sounds too much like hard work............
it's a good job i'm neither........ ...........

but what horrible experiences have you had?...........what should we watch out for?.........hell, i probably wouldn't even notice..............lol
should we all be scared now???........

fluffy

[Cheryl]

very interesting Wonderbunny...........

[Jimenem]

My family was the victim of a psychopath! Our next door neighbor!! We got tangled in all sorts of legal matters, Stupid lies, false police reports on us and everything, it was not fun having the cops over at our house 3 times a week because our Dogs were barking too loudly, One time he even called the cops on my little sister (5 years old) for SINGING TOO LOUDLY IN THE BACK YARD!!!!!!!! No Kidding!!! He wasn't an old grumpy man either, he was a 24 year old A**HOLE. He would shoot bottle rockets at my little cousin (also 5) and tear down OUR property and say We did it to His property. Break one of his own windows and call the police to say my uncle did it. I wish I were joking but I'm dead serious. It's no fun dealing with a psycho!
His wife left him, because he was abusing her. After all the legal stuff was slowing down for us It started on her and my Uncle who she wound up marrying, *Sigh* it's still not over with completely it's been going on for the better part of 5 years. Luckily he doesn't live next door anymore, therefore we don't see the cops as much (thankfully) but anyway. . . thats my life! See why I need comic relief!

[fluffy]

That sounds terrible............really really awful..........

as i understand it a sociopath hates society and knows exactly what they are doing...................
a psychopath has all sorts of psychiatric issues and doesn't know why or what they are doing...............
Both usually have some deep underlying life grudges........but only the sociopath has real control of their choices..........

so who is the most dangerous...........?
Well it's the pychopath who has no control or sense of guilt...they're the serial killers..........
The sociopath gets the anti-social neighbour order and prison sentences...

But they are far rarer than we think...........so don't worry......they are both extremely rare conditions............as is multi-personality disorder.......so rare we'll probably never encounter someone in our life-times...........
but those who have had the mis-fortune..........my sympathies are with you....


Fluffy

[lammy]

I'm not worried-my life is no big deal-

[fluffy]

me neither Lammy........ .........

not unless any of my 'kids' turn into Charles Manson types, hell bent on seeking revenge, for a dentention lunch-time when they we 12....

BBBrrrr.......... i hope not..............

fluffy

[lammy]

Although I was played with once by I don't know who it was-they said they were working for Steven spielberg and needed pictures of me and I actually talk to some guy and he gave me numbers that to my surprise where fake-all that I lost was trust- Postage money and my pride to have fallen for such stupidity!!

I have dealt with psychos on the internet trying to make me feel like shit and I did but I've grown to know that I can't trust just anyone anymore...



Anyway-life is a bitch-

[fluffy]

Is that internet dating Lammy?...............i'm too scaredy to try ......................you do hear weird stories about internet perverts.....and married men wanting a fling............
sounds too complicated and scary for me i'm afraid.........

I'm far too trusting...........bordering on naive....so i try to be guarded, but usually tread in where angels fear to tread, then have to make a hasty retreat..............lol

fluffy

[quirky]

My aunt met her husband online. I know lots of people who have had success with it, too. But at the heart of me I'm scared.

[lammy]

No dating online, it was a jerk off that had nothing else better to do than to bug my ass and toy with my emotions, besides- in real life I have losers come to me imagine an online dating fling-I am afraid I would attract a molester or a murder and I have kids and can't put myself out there like that...I would only date online if it was Jim-

[wonderbunny]

I had a few run ins with a few of them. I tried to figure out what is it about me, I felt like I was a magnate for them. I had a few relationships that were completely devastating for me. I found myself at a loss of what is it? I found a lot of research material and found out why, I was naive; trusting and love everyone I meet. The injured bird gets the most attention, and there I am running to sooth the poor sole. Perfect bait. Now i"m homeless and used all the savings I had and home l sale proceeds to payoff the legal bills associated with the last psychopath that entered my life. Financials loss, $300,000. What triggered it? I phoned a so-called friend to 'try to vent and problem solve' this friend tape recorded the call and played for the psychopath. She heard what I said and my life was never the same. The phone call was three years ago. I'm still paying the price. I lost custody of my daughter based on false allegations by the woman who spoke with my exhusband; I spent time in jail for reasons I still to understand (I dropped computer disks) and spent 90 days in the county jail. As a trial paralegal I cant' practice law anymore. I haven't been able to find employment since. Mindblowing, isn't it? Someone's got to something about her (psycho biddy from Hell's) temper.

[fluffy]

I would only date online if it was Jim-

lol............wouldn't we all...........lol.......i guess i'd make an exception for him.........


And Wonderbunny........i may have confused you with someone else....(i seem to have done an awful lot of that recently...lol..........if only we weren't all so covert....but i guess we have to be........... )
Your story sounds truely terrible .............i hope you are getting all the help you need............It'll take strength and courage to cope...........
i'm sure i would have folded early on in the saga..........

best wishes

fluffy

[mav]

Wonderbunny, that's awful!!! I don't know how you survived. Are you in debt?

That's a very heavy price, just the legal financial cost by itself is staggering. I don't know what to say. But you have survived this far, one day at a time; walking with God. I marvel at you. I hope and pray you continue this way and never give up.
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